I recently made a commitment to 40 days of sadhana, or spiritual practice. I made it 5. Things got in the way, I had my friends' kiddos for a weekend, then I was sick, then, and then, and then. I could tell you all of the reasons why I cut my 40 days short, but instead, I will tell you all of the reasons, I am making that same dedication, again.
During my off time, I tried to stay focused on what I needed to stay grounded. It worked for the first few days, but then it didn't anymore. It was less and less easy to stay grounded without that daily practice. I could feel it in my actions, my thoughts, my feelings, my being.
Part of the reason I was so easily able to abandon this practice was because I hadn't found a video of the exact practice that I wanted. The videos I found either didn't start with tuning in (which I feel is very important) or they didn't end with a shavasana (which is equally important). I think the plan was to eliminate these components in order to shorten the amount of time needed, but they are very necessary, especially for beginners. Other videos had these components, but didn't have as many prana (breath) exercises or physical exercises to conserve time.
The video I did for those 5 days (and staggered various days before) was a 30 minute video that started with tuning in, proceeded to the prana and physical poses and ended with shavasana. Every time I did it I felt energized, relaxed and grounded, but there was this feeling that something was missing. After much thought and introspection, I decided the video wasn't long enough. I wasn't really sure what was missing, but I knew I needed a full hour to get what I needed from the practice.
This morning I tried a different video and it was much more physically demanding that I'm used to, but I found some valuable lessons in it. It was an hour long and began with tuning in. It went on to physical yoga poses (I have no idea what they are called) that focused on squatting, bending, and laying all while visualizing each chakra connected to the earth. This video ended with shavasana and meditation on staying grounded. It was perfect and I plan to complete it again tomorrow.
One thing I learned in today's video is about being able to ground myself quickly when needed. I struggle with this and know it is a learning curve that will hopefully come with time. In today's video she had us walk around the room, imagining a mirror image of ourselves connected to our feet and penetrating the earth while using your toes to grip the ground as you walk. I imagined myself in a grassy meadow, walking barefoot, gripping the earth with my toes while a golden string tethered my root chakra to the earth and the same golden string tethered my crown chakra to the heavens. It felt amazing and I know it will be useful for a quick grounding when needed.
I left today's session feeling grounded, connected, open and energized. I plan to repeat the same video tomorrow. Once I am seasoned enough I will be able to create my own sessions or use those more established in Kundalini. But right now, this baby needs to have someone guide her along and until I'm more versed in kundalini, I will need to follow someone with more experience than me. I would one day like to create a video of myself, merely for me to follow along, doing the kyrias for each of the chakras so I can include what I needed for these to be effective. However, for now, I will focus on seeing this 40 days to fruition.
A spiritual journey is not about all of the times you fall off, it is about all of the times that you get back up!